I never dreamed he’d play such a pivotal role in my home, but here he is.
Tag: starting a family
I Make Up Ridiculous Songs About My Kids
They’re my song inspirations and my entire captive studio audience.
Writing “The Expectant Father’s Activity Book”
From the moment I heard the concept, I knew it would reach far beyond dads-to-be and grab onto everyone withing arm’s length.
Brawling With My Children
This kid is made of steel. He’s like a Batman villain.
Daddy Kills The Bugs
Hell hath no fury like an escaped Daddy Longlegs.
My Family Deals Girl Scout Cookies
Everyone’s jonesing for that hit of the S’mores. It’s like a town full of Wimpys, promising, “I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a Snickerdoodle today.”
It’s like getting abducted by a UFO. You went into this awful experience with an absurdly difficult and disgusting task. Next thing you know, it’s 45 minutes later and you’re sitting on the floor finished, with no recollection of how you got there or what you did.
I Feed These Kids Garbage
I want to give lectures about what I was forced to call meals as a child and how we don’t get to choose what we want to eat. But, alas, I’m tired. So I plop the Eggos in the toaster and everyone enjoys their morning.
Suddenly I Was A Suburban Dad
People assume we are born this way. Our Dadness starts on day one.
Making School Lunches, Making Me Crazy
It’s my edible nemesis and my new daily nightmare. Welcome to fatherhood, pops.
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