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Lucas is my baby, but he’s also gigantic. At 14 years old, he’s nonverbal and requires my assistance with many tasks. I’m still teaching him new things every day.

I call Lucas my little manatee whenever he takes a bath. He lays down as if he’s in bed and just lets the water soak over him. I’ll encourage him to rub the soap in, and he usually just stares at me with an expression that seems to say, “I hear you, but no.”

The soap isn’t the issue. The issue is how he gets out of the tub. When it’s time to come out and get dressed, he mosh pits his way to his feet. Water flies everywhere, and soon I’m hanging on driftwood in his bathroom like a scene from Titanic. Go on without me, Rose. I gotta get this kid dressed.

It was a particularly wall-soaked bath last week when my guy got out of the tub and, as I surveyed the damage, I knew I had a lot to clean. I brought him into his room.

In there, we encountered another thing I’ve been working with him on – getting dressed.

Every night, Lucas wears a onesie to bed. It’s like a kid in a Norman Rockwell painting. His thermal button-down sleepers have chewed sleeves and, in the grand scheme of things, can be a little difficult to put on.

Luckily, he’s gotten good with pants. So I usually have him do the bottom part of the onesie himself. One foot in, second foot in, and that’s it. I then have Lucas sit down and get the rest on himself.

He has a great system too. On the bed, he’ll cross his legs and begin reaching into the foot hole to find his toes. As he does, he peels back the pants until he can pop his foot out. It’s adorable, albeit time-consuming.

The rest requires some help. He needs to pull it up and get his arms through. In most cases, the sleeves are inside out, and he needs me to help him.

That was the case on this Titanic evening. With a wave of my hand, he put down his iPad and the screen locked to black. From there, I had him work his feet, but I knew the rest would be tough. So I left him on the edge of the bed to play find-the-toes while I went to go mop up the aftermath.

As I did, I have to admit something. I kind of forgot about him.

I don’t mean for hours, but longer than I would have had I not been preoccupied. I was just kind of on a cleaning roll, and ten minutes had gone by without me even noticing.

Just as I was folding a replacement towel for the room, I felt a tap on my shoulder. When I turned around, there was Lucas…

Fully dressed in his onesie.

Seriously. He did everything but the buttons. He got his legs through, pulled it up, turned the freakin’ arms right-side-out, and put it on. I kid you not. It was all perfect.

And there he was, holding his iPad and handing it to me for the unlock code.

I freaked out.

Suddenly, the manatee from minutes earlier was receiving massive cheers and applause. Yay, Lucas!

And, as would be expected, he stared at me with a blank stare and an outstretched iPad.

That’s right, Lucas no-sells things like this. Like the Undertaker absorbing a punch with a cold stare to his opponent, Lucas soaks up applause like a polite inconvenience. His expression says, “Not sure why you’re screaming and smiling, but when you’re done, I need this iPad unlocked.”

So I did. I unlocked it.

Make no mistake, though. This was major. Like so many of his achievements, Lucas found motivation in the things he wanted. That iPad wasn’t unlocking itself, and he wasn’t getting it unless he got his pajamas on.

It didn’t matter how tough it was or whether he had done it before. He did it now. He knew what was needed, and he made it happen.

Had you asked me even five minutes earlier, I’d have said that was an impossibility. The feet took time. Pulling it up sometimes caused confusion. Correcting inside-out sleeves? No way. That was the advanced class. We were in Introduction to Pajamas 101.

Yet, there he was. Fully dressed. To say I was proud would be an understatement. To say I was amazed might even be one too.

I can’t even begin to imagine the things he might be capable of one day or even now. What he knows isn’t necessarily hidden away. It’s just sort of sitting there, waiting for the opportunity to be shown. He’s not purposely withholding it. He’s just not given the chance to demonstrate it.

That’s where I come in. It goes beyond the patience of waiting for him to put his shoes on. It’s about even knowing what might be possible. Who would have thought?

The Onesie Victory was a major step and one that will set the pace moving forward. Who knows what else is in there? With motivations like iPads and potato chips, his potential might be limitless.

Am I overreaching? Perhaps. Still, reach for the moon, fall among the stars or something, right? Something about stars. I don’t know.

All I know is my guy has surprised me on more than one occasion. I just need to remember that when the time is right. Unlocking his true potential is a job for the both of us.

My Essay in HuffPost: “I Don’t Want a Cure for My Son’s Autism”

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New Episodes December 5 – HiPodImDad.com Spotify, Audible, Everywhere #autism #autismawareness #autismacceptance #autismappreciation #fyp
♬ original sound – James Guttman